I’m not scared of the fact that I’m visiting another continent. I’m not scared of being in an unknown environment all by myself. I can admit that I’m a little bit scared of being hit by some strange decease but all of the things that involves me being in Kenya are things that I know I will be able to handle. I’m sure it will be difficult and hard but by living one day at a time I will come out on the other side with new experiences and in the end. Because, no matter if the experiences are good or bad they will make you grow as a person.
However, anxiety hits me when I think about the fact that I’m going to write an essay while I’m there. I know that I can only do my best but what if my best is not enough and what if I under the circumstances feel that I’m unable to do my best? In order to be able to call the project completed, there needs to be an approved essay at the end of my journey. My mind panics when I think about the all the work I’ve done and all the things I will have sacrificed and in the end it might just end up as a failed project.
I have decided though that I will refuse to let my time in Africa only be about essay writing. The essay is a big part of the trip but all the experiences I will have are as important. Not only for me, but my plan is to be able to inspire people and tell people about my experiences when I come home. I want to show people what it can be like in Africa and I want to, even if it’s just for one person, change their image of Africa. That makes at least some of the anxiety go away and makes me a little bit less scared of failing.